The Locker Room

An investigation is going on in North Yorkshire Police, after the Chief Constable, Della Cannings, ordered a new en suite shower for her office. Apparently she received an electric shock off the old one. The quote from the builder was £6000, which included new toilet, wash basin, and shower unit. Surprise surprise, when the bill came in it was for £28,000, nearly five times the original bill. Abig enquiry is on going as to why the big increase in the final bill.

Following on from my questions on sheep ...I have more questions. I think I am going through a sheep fetish <?:namespace prefix = v ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:vml" /><?:namespace prefix = o ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:office" /> 1) If there is one female sheep and two or more rams then what happens. ..do they fight over her...or do they all have a go at copulating with her (that’s a bit crude I know..lol...but u know what I mean). Do sheep display ritualised displays when they want to show who the man is to minimise harm? 2) I assume female sheep lactate as they are mammals. and was a bit curious as to whether you have tasted their m…

Another sop to the Muslim Community. GMP will not arrest Muslims during Ramadan, or when they are at prayers. We have to be delicate, and tread carefully with our Muslim friends. Even one of the top Muslims in Manchester has stated that it is aload of boll...., if they need arresting, they should be arrested. He says there should not be law for them, and different for others. What a pity there are not more around like him, with abit of common sense. Apparently it is only on warrants that are already in existence, they can still be arrested for other offences. Perhaps they shouldn't arrest Christians on a Sunday, or when on the way to, or home from Church. What is…

I have just watched Trevor Phillips on News 24, spouting off about riots on the streets, as a result of the 'full veils' controversy. What a pompous, arrogant, condescending man he is, full of himself, with that hollier than thou attitude. I think the Government should consider replacing him as quickly as possible. He thinks he is so clever, but he could be dangerous with his simplistic views on life and the community. Race issues are not as easy to sort out as TP thinks they are.

http://video.google.co.uk/videoplay?docid=-33824915879792498 36 What do you think? The song's not bad, cover version of a seventies song. Hasselhoff is so cheesy. It's like watching someones's dad in a mid-life crisis

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/programmes/from_our_own_correspon dent/5371500.stm

Who says we need Airbags in cars! Crash Victim Saved By Breast Implants

Seems like just another day in my office... http://uk.rd.yahoo.com/oa/*http://uk.download.yahoo.com/pr/f u/oa/asss1.wmv

The Squirrel & The Grasshopper, (REST OF THE WORLD VERSION) The squirrel works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building and improving his house and laying up supplies for the winter. The grasshopper thinks he's a fool, and laughs and dances and plays the summer away. Come winter the squirrel is warm and well fed. The shivering grasshopper has no food or shelter, so he dies out in the cold. THE END The Squirrel & The Grasshopper, (THE BRITISH VERSION) The squirrel works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building and improving his house and laying up supplies for the winter. The grasshopper thinks he's a fool, and laughs and dances an…

Office of Chancellor of the Exchequer, 11 Downing Street, London. Dear Tony, I am, first and foremost the most skilled and comitted Chancellor of the Exchequer ever to resign from what is left of the ’Pits’ of a politcal party. A combination of fellow Ministers threatening and blackmailing each other, the latest biography of David Blunkett, and the constant bitching of your wife, Cherry, has forced me to consider my position at this time as being completley and utterly untenable. An offer of £350 thousand pounds from Senor Belusconi, plus free bonking with a page three girl, and a goat could not convince me to stay as part of your Sleazy Moronic Cabinet. A position o…

I think its time we all got to know each other, just that little bit better. So, I've devised a few things that I think will give us an insight into our personalities. 1.) Favourite Song - Throw it all away - Zero 7 (Seen them live in Brighton...best night of my life) or You're my flame (zero 7) 2.) Favourite film - The Shawshank redemption (getting one up on the system and teaching patience) 3.) Favourite TV Show - Spaced (I know it back to front and upside down for quotes!) 4.) Favourite colour - A rich blue and reminds me of a darkening sky in summer 5.) Favourite possession - My Ipod...without doubt 6.) Favourite place - Amsterdam (for the good ti…

A House of Commons select committee says £175 million pounds is wasted every year on delays in the Courts system, of which the Police and CPS are responsible for £24 million, of that amount. They say that the CPS and Police have to get 'their act together', The Police cannot be blamed for insufficient evidence in files. The CPS are responsible for examining files, prior to going to court. If there is insufficient evidence, it should then be sent back to the police for more evidence. It's no good the CPS going ahead with the case, then blaming the police when it all goes wrong. The committee want Judges and Magistrates not to take notice of 'last minute guilty pl…

Friendship Prayer..... May the fleas of a thousand camels infest the crotch of the person who screws up your day............... and may their arms be too short to scratch........ AMEN

Some you it succeed, some you don't. I think you'll see the confidence in the public transport as shown by this side of the House in that they think it is an important part of the transport system. I saw in the paper today, how many Transport ministers, Barbara Castle, they said, was popular, when Barbara Castle brought in seat belts and drunk driving, she was very unpopular. For example, the underground used to talk to me about there something like £12 billion of investment is needed because of disinvestment and that's a cost,disinvestment you know, lousy services is a cost to the passenger and if you can get a long-term investment we need to take into account h…