The Locker Room

Does anyone have a favourite wine they can recommend? I like to drink wine, but am sadly not past buying whatever's on special offer in the supermarket yet!

Cows. Causing trouble again. This time they're being used to reveal the many quirks of international economics. And why not.... Traditional Capitalism: You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull. Your herd multiplies, and the economy grows. You sell the herd and retire on the income. However, if you're... An American Corporation: You have two cows. You sell one, and force the other to produce the milk of four cows. You are surprised when the cow drops dead. A French Corporation: You have two cows. You go on strike because you want three cows. A Japanese Corporation: You have two cows. You re-design them so they are one-tenth the size of…

How True!

We need an emoticon for tantrums! Maybe a smiley wielding an axe? I'm editing a report that will go to the government. Several people have looked at the doc and put in their comments. I'm at the last page and I need to insert some information--one or two sentences on each of the points. The comment refers me to a document produced by the government giving the "rules" for how such sentences are to be done. 44 bloody pages. Why? Tell me why? I don't want this to be my bedtime reading. It's not fair just so that the USG can pat itself on the back and say oh, gee, look, what a wonderful job your taxpayer dollars are doing[/] If I have questions, I'm supposed to appeal to…

http://news.yahoo.com/s/nm/20060928/film_nm/life_borat_dc White House turns away "Kazakh reporter" Borat By Andy Sullivan Thu Sep 28, 5:34 PM ET WASHINGTON (Reuters) - Borat, the fictional TV reporter from Kazakhstan, may have gotten under the skin of Kazakh officials but on Thursday he couldn't get past the gates of the White House. 'Secret Service agents turned away British comedian Sacha Baron Cohen, in character as the boorish, anti-Semitic journalist, when he tried to invite "Premier George Walter Bush" to a screening of his upcoming movie, "Borat: Cultural Learnings of America for Make Bene…

A man appeared before the Judge charged with domestivc violence. His wife asked to be sent to a place of safety. The Judge sent her to Sunderland Football Club. She asked the Judge what good would that do. The Judge told her nobody gets beaten at Sunderland.

Anyone got any tips....? Have to give a 20 minute presentation to my department.Thanks!

From today's Metro, page 16:- Asda trademarks the word 'chav'. Asda has launched a bid to corner the 'chav' market - by registering the slang word as a trademark for a line of sweets [candy]. The chain, named as Britain's cheapest supermarket by The Grocer magazine for a ninth successive year, has applied to register 'Chav' and 'Chav Sweets'. Anyone who wishes to object to registration of the word now has three months to notify the Trademark Registry. It is unclear whether fake Burberry tartan will be used for the packaging.

Had to read this article twice ! STRASBOURG, France (Reuters) - Former Soviet double agent George Blake won a human rights case against the government on Tuesday for the "excessive length" of legal proceedings aimed at stopping him earning royalties from his memoirs. Europe's top human rights court, the European Court of Human Rights, awarded Blake 5,000 euros (3,347 pounds) in damages and 2,000 euros in costs and expenses. Blake, an ex-member of British foreign intelligence agency MI6, was sentenced by a British court to 42 years in prison in 1961 for spying for the Soviet Union. He escaped from London's Wormwood Scrubs prison five years later and fled …

S'not for you pensioners out here, so take it easy maverick and Penby http://www.yogachallenge.co.uk/

A Nursery School owner was cleared by the Court of assaulting a two year old child. The magistrates ruled that the carer had used reasonable force. The mother of the child told the court that she was entirely satisfied with the way the teacher had handled her daughter. Last year Northamptonshire Council tried to make Mrs Rack sack one of her workers because she did not have the proper qualifications, Mrs Rack refused and won a court case against the Council, ever since the court case Northamptonshire have waged a vandetta against Mrs Rack. Two of the Councils workers went to the school and alleged that they saw Mrs Rack poke the two year old and drag her across the …

Hi all, Please excuse the cheek but being ex-police staff I'm hoping you'll empathise with an escapee trying to make good. I've just started up my own home staging business and trying to get as many hits as possible on my website to up its Google rating. If you have a spare minute please take a look http://www.style-guide.co.uk THANKS!

Can anyone remember the site name for the armed services oracle that police oracle also runs?

Just been sent this, obviously it's a joke, so please do not read any further if jokes upset you...... I have nothing personally against 'liberals', in fact some of my best friends are liberals, I went to school with several liberals, I have attended several courses that required me to fully embrace liberalism etc! Meanwhile back in 'La-La' land......... A female liberal wrote a lot of letters to the White House complaining about the treatment of a captive insurgents (terrorists) being held in Guantanamo Bay. She received back the following reply: The White House 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue Washington, D.C. 20016 Dear Concerned Citizen,…

A man and woman wanted by Devon and Cornwall police, have been found dead on a Yacht which they stole from Mylor Habour, near Falmouth. They were believed to have been killed by pirates off the coast of Senegal. Thats what I call poetic justice. This was the third boat they had stolen, they were both on bail for theft of a boat when they stole this one. Some people never learn. Maverick2238984.7272337963