The Locker Room

Our fresh faced , wet behind the ears , never had a proper job Foreign Secretary David Milliband has suggested that the European Union should be enlarged to include countries from North Africa, The Middle East and RUSSIA ! Is this some sort of wind up ??? Is the smug little twerp serious ????? We can't cope with the rapid expansion of new member sates now .....and the associated benefits and PROBLEMS that this can bring about , so why even suggest this ???? What on earth can he think this can do for The UK or indeed any other EU country !!!!

This is a new means of punishment designed to fob off the bean bag sitters whilst appeasing the retributionist’s needs for harsh punishment. There are certain vibrations generated by the cell walls which induce “living nightmares”. This is where the prisoner finds themselves dreaming so vividly of a situation, it is as if they are truly living that life. They then wake and record their experiences in the form of a story. It is very experimental and nobody knows what will happen to the prisoner should he or she actually die in the dream world, although the softies have been assured that the prisoner comes to no physical harm. The prisoner may …

A thug Rugby player who stamped on another players head during a line out, has been sent to prison for 15 months. Rhys Garfield 23 years, stamped on another players head so hard, he had a 10cm cut which required 30 stitches. The Judge said the only proper punishment was a custodial one. Garfield's solicitor came out with the usual rhetoric, it was totally out of character and he has shown genuine remorse. I expect he did when he thought he might go to prison. Good for the Judge.

This story makes me sad. Why is it beautiful people feel the need to expose themselves to risk of surgery?

Hello! Please go easy on me, this is my 1st post.... I'm a serving PC and have been for 3 years currently working on a response shift and i'm also trained in the Big Red Key (hence M.O.E!) Cheers M.O.E

Hello people, i am off to thailand tommorrow and whilst out there i will be looking to bulk buy a large quantity of the LED torches (good quality), just to make you aware.Possibly some other gadgetry! if anyone is interested post on here, just to give me a feel for the demand. make sure your quick as i am gone tommorrow! cheers mcgremlin

Oh dear, that's poor placing of the bus exhaust. I can imagine the stick that chaps getting..she seems to find it amusing though T

Police Monkeys A tourist visiting a far away country in the heart of god knows where (possibly Middlesbrough), walked into a pet shop and was looking at the animals on display. While he was there, a Police Sergeant walked in and said to the shopkeeper, I'll take a Traffic Patrol monkey please." The shopkeeper nodded, went over to the cage at the side of the shop and took out a monkey. He fit it with a collar and leash, handed it to the officer saying, "That'll be £5,000 please Sergeant" The Sergeant paid and walked out with his monkey. Startled, the tourist went over to the shopkeeper and said "That was a very expensive monkey. Most of them are only…

Just like to introduce myself... I'm 17 years old and in my last year of school. I'm seriously considering joining the police when I leave. I have done two lots of work experiance with the Devon and Cornwall Constabulary (Year 10- Station Enquries Officer and Year 12- Youth Intervention Officer). Really enjoyed both lots!! One slight problem is university.....not sure to go or not. I know that I don't need a degree to get in but for future promotion and specialising after 2 years.......will it be benefical? Cheers, 9091

But which one would you want back?

I'm building a new computer....I have all the bits, or have identified them, bar the monitor..... anyone recommend one?

Dear football fan, Are you up for a football challenge? Your friend (Kirkie) has already entered the fantastic Vital Fantasy Football competition and is boasting that they have far more football knowledge and would make a much better manager than you! What do you reckon? Are they having a laugh? Can you prove yourself the better boss? We thought so... Here's what to do: 1: Go to http://www.vitalfantasyfootball.co.uk/ 2: Click on Register and go through the registration and team selection process 3: Once you are on your team line-up page, click on Mini League and type the following information in the Join A Mini League boxes: League Name: UK Police Online Passwor…

Mr M has just treated himself to some Welsh Whisky. I thought people might like to know about it. It's called Penderyn. www.welsh-whisky.co.uk

Hi all, Thought I'd make an appearance on the forum before I hopefully embark on my new career. A little about me, well I'm currently a Special constable, and taking my fitness test on thurday for the CNC, but still umming and arghing about whether it's what I really want to do (so any advice on the CNC would be much appreciated). I have just finished my masters in Forensic Investigation and did my degree in Criminology, I'm currently working in marketing (random I know)! Anyway I think that's me BeccaB

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/tees/7090164.stm I'm wondering how much fuel is used in growing and transporting this... but I've had a good idea... get prisoners working on it.