The Locker Room

Heres a few: You say : "'Ere thrice the sun done salutation to the dawn" And you claim these words as your own But I've read well, and I've heard them said A hundred times (maybe less, maybe more) If you must write prose/poems The words you use should be your own Don't plagiarise or take "on loan" 'Cause there's always someone, somewhere With a big nose, who knows And who trips you up and laughs When you fall Who'll trip you up and laugh When you fall or Would you hold my hand If I saw you in heaven Would you help me stand If I saw you in heaven I'll find my way, through night and day Cause I know I just can't stay Here in heaven

I've had an idea for a game, with potentially funny results. Basically we all say a line, and when they are all strung together, it makes a rhyming poem! We each can only do one line per post, so It would go something like (for eg only): #1 Once upon a time on the motorway #2 HATO officers drove about all day! #3 one spotted a coach driven by Kenworthy #4 but is he driving safely? Oh we'll see! you get the picture SO I guess I had better start.. Once upon a time, down at the Nick...

My dad was just clearing out the garage and found these two Lancs Constab commemorative plates from 1986. 2 years older than me! Theres also a programme from the 1986 Open Day. It's really interesting how much the force has change in 24 years. Just thought I'd share it with you lot and wondered if you have any old police memorabilia or any interesting stuff?

A British tourist stranded in Venice by the volcanic ash crisis took this extraordinary picture of a ghostly face in the clouds above a famous church. Read more: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/worldnews/article-1270006/The-face-clouds-British-tourist-spots-ghostly-grimace-Venice-church.html#ixzz0n2ZRqir1 Can you see it, i cannot. The person is on cheap drugs.

He looks as though he is about to take his powerful motorbike for a speedy race along the streets. But this motorcyclist is going nowhere - he's dead. Read more: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/worldnews/article-1269846/The-quick-dead-Embalmed-biker-sits-astride-motorcycle-funeral-home.html#ixzz0masSFl9R We ask our Bikers out there, do you wish to be remembered in this way? MellowMonster would obviously be on a horse.Our HATO friends on a dustcart with a HATO logo. The list goes on.

Got any interesting bits of manifesto detail?

Happy Birthday Misery Guts.

My iTunes told me I had to update but could not until I had updated my Safari to Version 4.0.3 (I currently have v3.0.4). When I tried to install this it said I needed OS X v 10.5.7 to do so. I went via Software update to find that v 10.5.8 is now available so downloaded that. My computer will not install it though. When my computer restarts it goes through the initialising process and the blue line of progress just stops. I left it installing for 3 days as I went away but on my return there was no progress. I then back to the Apple site and downloaded 10.5.7 in case I had to install that first but when I go through the installation process it stops at Destination Selec…

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vARl4s992qQ

Wishing you a Very Happy Birthday Uncle, welcome to the O.A.P Club.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/election/article-1269986/General-Election-2010-Labour-campaign-descends-farce-car-crashes-poster-launch.html <li style="padding-top: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; list-style-type: none; list-style-position: initial; list-style-image: initial; ">Car smashes into bus shelter just behind Labour event<li style="padding-top: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; list-style-type: none; list-style-position: initial; list-style-imag…

http://www.theregister.co.uk/2010/04/28/papuan_police/ Papuans whose todgers have been unnaturally enhanced are as of right now barred from joining the police on the grounds that such members are a "hindrance during training". Is this ban enforced here too?

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1268412/Nearly-50-years-Ronnie-Biggs-victim-crime.html Poor old Ronnie, it's ok for him to rob trains and assault train drivers, but it's not OK when he gets his property attacked. Someone is getting some retribution there Ronnie, get over it.

More Labour crap. More lies and spin. Apparently Labour Faithful are leafleting various constituencies, including Gollum's own in Kirkaldy, that if the Torys get into office, they will totally abolish Bus Passes for the over 60s, the Heating Allowance and free TV licences for the over 75s. Of course Call Me Dave Cameron has publicly denied that this would be Tory Policy if in office - I for one beleive him. Our Much Esteemed Dear Leader, Gollums McClown publicly stated that he had.... "not authorised these leaflets..!" Hmmm! Why should I believe this? After all, so it is oft stated.... "The Buck Stops here..!" (with the Partie Fhurer.. Gollums McClown!]. …