MrKguy 28 Posted December 17, 2011 Share Posted December 17, 2011 Interested to know about this, My gran died yesterday in here care home, The whole family visited here everyday for about a week before as she was sick, now the situation is she is broken up with my granddad ( who did not visit ) for 22 years and NOT divorced. He left her for another women after he gambled her house away and nearly left her homeless and he NEVER has talked to her since he left and now all the relatives think it is inappropriate for him to be at the funeral , he has also done bad things with his parents, his mum died on a train and my dad at age 15 had to verify the body . As he was we now now with the women he was going to leave my nan for, so he never went to the funeral of his parents as he was cheating without anybody knowing and did not tell us were he was , so no one could contact him. He never actually said sorry to her and did not speak to her for 22 years after leaving her and leaving her with no money, and 4 children. Now comes the dilemma, My dad, and other family members are refusing to let him go to the funeral as it is not what she would want and is a disrespect to her. He has threatened to call the police as he said its his legal wife ( not divorced ) and he is aloud to be at the funeral. This is a domestic is it not? How would you treat the situation if you got put there and do the police have any powers? and is a church with a funeral a public or private place? thanks for reading. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted December 17, 2011 Share Posted December 17, 2011 Firstly I'm very sorry to hear of your loss - my thoughts are with you and your family at this time. A church I guess is a private establishment, however it is a public place for the purposes of things like the Public Order Act - anyone can go in. The police have no power to stop someone from going into a church. The priest/vicar or someone officially connected to the church can refuse your grandfather entry (or ask him to leave), and theoretically the most the police could do would be to ensure that a breach of the peace does not occur if your grandfather was asked to leave. If they chose to eject him themselves they would only be acting as another person there - it would not be in the course of their duties should they be assaulted. In reality, I suspect most officers would take an exceptionally cautious approach - you could imagine the Daily Mail headline now - police forcibly remove widower from wife's funeral (he is still legally her husband). That would not go down well! You are under no obligation to tell him where / when the funeral will take place, but unfortunately this is a situation that you as a family have to deal with. If he were to turn up unexpectedly then you have a choice - ask him to leave (which potentially will cause quite a scene - not ideal at the funeral of your nan), or just ignore him and let him sit there. I hope it sorts itself out for you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrKguy 28 Posted December 17, 2011 Author Share Posted December 17, 2011 Firstly I'm very sorry to hear of your loss - my thoughts are with you and your family at this time. A church I guess is a private establishment, however it is a public place for the purposes of things like the Public Order Act - anyone can go in. The police have no power to stop someone from going into a church. The priest/vicar or someone officially connected to the church can refuse your grandfather entry (or ask him to leave), and theoretically the most the police could do would be to ensure that a breach of the peace does not occur if your grandfather was asked to leave. If they chose to eject him themselves they would only be acting as another person there - it would not be in the course of their duties should they be assaulted. In reality, I suspect most officers would take an exceptionally cautious approach - you could imagine the Daily Mail headline now - police forcibly remove widower from wife's funeral (he is still legally her husband). That would not go down well! You are under no obligation to tell him where / when the funeral will take place, but unfortunately this is a situation that you as a family have to deal with. If he were to turn up unexpectedly then you have a choice - ask him to leave (which potentially will cause quite a scene - not ideal at the funeral of your nan), or just ignore him and let him sit there. I hope it sorts itself out for you. thanks for the post Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted December 17, 2011 Share Posted December 17, 2011 I too am sorry to hear about this situation. I don't think this belongs in Scenario City, it's more of a 'help me' topic. Oh and I will also post our standard disclaimer. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted December 17, 2011 Share Posted December 17, 2011 Our standard disclaimer: This forum is not intended as a legal advice drop-in centre. PoliceSpecials.com disclaims any and all responsibility or liability for the accuracy, content, completeness, legality, reliability, operability or availability of information or material on this site, including - but not limited to - the documents available in the 'Reference Library' and 'Downloads' areas. Please note that comments and advice given here with the best of intentions by the host, moderators or other users of the forum may not be correct, and that any advice given, in particular advice on the law and its application, is no substitute for personal legal advice from a solicitor. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrKguy 28 Posted December 17, 2011 Author Share Posted December 17, 2011 I too am sorry to hear about this situation. I don't think this belongs in Scenario City, it's more of a 'help me' topic. Oh and I will also post our standard disclaimer. It is a little a scenario as I wanted opinions on what you do, but I get what you mean, and thanks. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
support1546080886 55 Posted December 17, 2011 Share Posted December 17, 2011 It is a little a scenario as I wanted opinions on what you do, but I get what you mean, and thanks. Funerals and weddings are public and in most cases any person can attend, the issue might be that if an uninvited guest was to come to the funeral and police called then there might be a breach of the peace and the uninvited guest could be arrested to prevent a breach of the peace. But without being there or knowing the circumstances and each event is unique then it is difficult to give a definitive answer to you. I am sorry for your loss especially at this time of year makes it all the more difficult. My thoughts are with you. C. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
callsign-kid 1,617 Posted December 17, 2011 Share Posted December 17, 2011 Unfortunately these events do tend to bring out the worst in family tensions. Its not easy to lose a relative like that, I do feel for you. Giraffe has given some good advice there. I would try to avoid the situation to begin with by not telling him where the funeral is to be held. In any case if it were me I'd want the minimum disruption possible at the service. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrKguy 28 Posted January 5, 2012 Author Share Posted January 5, 2012 just saying thanks to everybody and situation is now resolved. peacefully. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts